Category Archives: Ramblings

misc. chatter about books, romance, and life.

On Amnesty International’s recommendation to completely decriminalize prostitution and related work (AKA pimping).

So. Amnesty International just came out in favor of decriminalizing prostitution and related work.

“consensual sexual conduct between adults—which excludes acts that involve coercion, deception, threats, or violence—is entitled to protection from state interference.”

In response, many organizations purported to be anti-trafficking, as well as a great many celebrities, including Anne Hathaway, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Meryl Streep, and Lena Dunham have spoken out against that policy, stating “[We are] deeply troubled by Amnesty’s proposal to adopt a policy that calls for the decriminalization of pimps, brothel owners and buyers of sex — the pillars of a $99 billion global sex industry.” (The full letter can be downloaded at that link.)

And in the wake of this disagreement, I’m seeing a lot of misunderstandings pop up. So I’m gonna try to clear a few of them up. Massive trigger warning on this: rape, violence toward women, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, racism, poverty, and a host of other issues are gonna come up. Much of this is US centered, however many things also hold true for the global sex trade, though the specifics of the laws may vary.

Continue reading On Amnesty International’s recommendation to completely decriminalize prostitution and related work (AKA pimping).

The Windshield Theory, or, Writing Sexual Abuse In Fiction

While I was writing Edgeplay, probably the darkest thing I may ever write, I solidified a few of my thoughts about the handling of abuse and rape in fiction. These are my personal opinions only, as a survivor, and a friend or relative to many other survivors. I am not a mental health professional in any way shape or form. YMMV.

I’m primarily going to talk about sexual violence in this, since that’s what I was focusing on for the story, but a lot of the same principles apply to other kinds of trauma, like domestic abuse, PTSD, childhood neglect or abuse.

Trigger warning: this post contains explicit discussion of sexual violence, domestic violence, PTSD and mental illness, and a host of other potentially triggering issues.

Continue reading The Windshield Theory, or, Writing Sexual Abuse In Fiction

Katie, on Suz deMello’s Velvet Lair

A ways back, I got the chance to talk with Suz deMello, an awesome e-rom writer. Two of our books appear alongside each other in the WTRAFSOG Gemstone Collection. I’m planning on reviewing her book Perilous Play, soon, as it covers aspects of BDSM that are along my sore spots when other projects cover them badly.

Anyways, check me out on her blog.

#5. Do wear glittery eyeshadow. There’s a time and a place for everything. And glittery eyeshadow can take an ordinary smoky eye from date night to larger than life.  A little in the inner corner of the eye can light up your face. Or even covering the lids completely. The trick to keeping it in place is in what you use to stick it to your skin. Some companies produce sticky primers, like Fyrinnae’s Pixie Epoxy, that are good. To be honest, though, my favorite is plain old Vaseline.  This doesn’t work for normal eyeshadow, because Vaseline sits on the skin, and will smear it around. But that exact lack of absorption makes it basically ideal for keeping hold of the glitter all night long. Put it ONLY on the lid, not where your eye creases- in the crease, it will move around more. And use as little as you can. Just enough to make the skin tacky.

Count the rest down with her!

Love and lapdances!

Music Review: Lana Del Rey’s Ultraviolence, Track By Track

For another good review of the album, though not track-by-track, you might enjoy Times’ review. I certainly did- it summed up my feelings mostly perfectly, by tying it in with some of the nostalgia that is coming to dominate our culture, and looking at the ways we use it as a shorthand to avoid exploring alternate ideas.

“I keep looking deeper into Ultraviolence because I want to understand what Del Rey is trying to understand. I want to know why the culture around me keeps grasping at past emblems — why advertising for 40-year-old movies still decorates college dorm rooms, why I can make my iPhone look like a Polaroid, why 90,000 people sing along to roots rock at Bonnaroo. I want to know why we reuse these tropes uncritically, reaching for analog without asking what gives it power. Lana Del Rey looks at the imagery we keep and tries to find what’s missing in it. What do we avoid looking at when we buy pictures of Marilyn Monroe, not thinking of why Norma Jeane Mortenson died so young? Whose stories do we allow to remain subdued?”

Continue reading Music Review: Lana Del Rey’s Ultraviolence, Track By Track